While at work today I started thinking about how unfair life is to the good guys. I know I make mistakes and might not be squeaky clean, but I try my best to do the right thing… at least usually. Yet how often does this turn out in my favor? Practically never. Letting my coworkers take big deliveries so they can make bank tips. Helping out a friend and when they say they will make it up to you even though you know that they actually wont. Giving my sister rides and constantly covering for her. All that leaves me with an empty wallet, lost time, and a guilty conscience. But what pisses me off the most is how it always ruins my chances with girls. What ever girl wants is a bad boy who they try to turn good. They are attracted to the whole rough, sexy, masculine guys who always end up being douchebags. They then get angry/sad when they realize that they cannot change them into the sweet, loving, caring guy that they really want on the inside. And then they complain that there are no good guys in the world. Um, yes there are. You just left them stuck in the friend zone. So what if I never played football or have abs? So what if I have only dated 3 other girls before? So what if I don’t have a cool car and tons of money? I am loyal, I am passionate, and I honestly am a ton of fun. But fine, go ahead and try to win over your bad boy. I will be waiting over here all by myself for another ten years until you women realize that I am really what you want.
At what age do people develop the ability to drink alcohol responsibly? By law, the magic age is on their 21st birthday. But is this true to everybody? In reality, the human brain doesn’t have a little switch that goes off when they turn 7670 days old that suddenly allows them to consume alcohol and act more maturely than they did the day before.
Some people set weight loss goals in pounds, others in waist size. Some want to look good in a swimsuit and others want to get back into their favorite pair of jeans. My goal: to get into shape and look sexy as hell in a suit. I’ve already made quite some progress, so even though I’m only a couple months in, I’m confident I can do it. February is always a hard month for me, between the gloomy weather and reoccurring family issues. So I was glad that I was able to make it though it, and be able to see that I came out better than before.
I tried to be strong enough for the both of us,
Even when our lives felt so goddamn torturous.
To say that I was never really there for you?
I sacrificed so much but you don’t even have a clue
That the shit that I daily had to shelter you from
Made me feel so fucking weak, worthless and dumb.
I never let you see me shed a single tear
So you never had to feel the same worry or fear.
This pain I felt is still hiding deep inside of me,
Never will I get the chance to finally feel free
To tell you what I have been thinking this entire time.
If you ask me, I would lie, and say that I’m doing fine.
I just had a crazy fuckin idea: a mash-up of Hedwig’s Theme (Harry Potter) and the Imperial March (Star Wars). I have no idea how to make this, or even what software to use. But Im gonna find a way. And its gonna be amazing.
Last night I sat on the stairs in front of my house. Simple concrete steps, only eight of them. The air was cold yet felt far from freezing. Most of the snow had melted away that afternoon. Such unusual weather for late January. I pulled out my phone from my pocket to check it. 2:58am, no new messages, no alerts. Back into my pocket my phone went. I was wearing khakis and a loose sweater. My feet kept warm by wool socks. Up in the dark sky not a single star could be seen. Not due to clouds, but suburban light pollution. Two airplanes were visible. Nothing really exciting to look at. I took another puff on my small cigar. It was cheap both in price and quality. Cars sped by on a busy road past the trees to my south. I could barely see them, but I sure could hear them. The air was still and no other noise could be heard other than the passing traffic. For some reason in this moment I felt at peace with myself. It wasn’t perfect serenity, it wasn’t a marvelous epiphany, it was raw honesty and humility. I felt at home in my own skin both physically and mentally. It lasted only for a few seconds. I finished my cigar, went inside, and fell asleep.
rock-me-salieri asked: I kinda love your blog. Like you don't just copy-paste shit, you put so much thought into it, and it's got actual substance. Well done :)
why thank you! I’m glad that somebody reads my stuff and actually likes it
In order to own the night,
We must first seize the day.
Those who don’t realize this
Are just wasting their time.
It’s not a lack of motivation,
Or unwillingness to try,
Some people just never learn
That work comes before play.
Freshman year: do homework on a regulate basis and finish research paper when scheduled, allowing adequate sleep every night
Senior year: procrastinate the paper until the night it is due, staying up late or all night but still handing it in on time
Me now: Only 5 points off for each class period late?! Pshhh. Staying up until 3am watching musicals and sleeping in late, skipping my morning classes
we are stuck with the
c h o i c e s
that we have made
they cannot be
u n d o n e
but isn’t that the
b e a u t y
of our short lives?
that every single
m o m e n t
we experience will
d e t e r m i n e
who we are
I have been sitting here with a blank text post for the past few hours. Sometimes the simplest, honest things you wish to say are the hardest ones to come out of your own mouth or type with your own fingers. The difficulty does not lie within self-confusion or being afraid of what others think. I am not saying that these thing do not affect me, because I am completely aware that they do. Truthfully, not even I know exactly who Logan really is. And yes, I am scared of what everyone else thinks about me. But these are not the reasons why its hard to speak.
